わたしのゆうつだいいちわ (watashi no yuutsu dai ichi wa)

as i took the unscheduled rest day..in which i was absent due to some personal problems and to the assignment that was left untouched because of some circumstances beyond my control but i'll try again tomorrow. anyway i kinda looked up to the sky twice. i realized i was totally out of sync,depressed,unwilling to think or do anything, this is a problem..a big problem for me. it must be fixed no matter what. i did learn my lessons back then but i think i still haven't learned that much. the reason i took up the course is that i was disillusioned with my current job, although one big difference is it pays-off. i gave up work to get to this school system to get a better job but i realized during my days here..it started to sour. today was the worst hit. i was thinking of really QUITTING for good. i don't think i'd have anym reason for staying in that institution anymore. looks like i'm disillusioned with life, i should probably think about my life for now. because i don't think that tomorrow or any other day would be different. august 26, the last day, i'd probably be on my way out. i wish i could do it earlier, because i'm really in a bad mood now. just for additional..i kinda looked up to the sky earlier this afternoon and a few hours ago..i just realized that what i said earlier, should be done. there is a lot of options left, i might lose the jap part which i really love so much, i guess everything has to go the hard way. nothing easy is in my life i guess..never was and never will. next month i want to look at that full moon again and probably enjoy something else. once again..this kind of lifestyle is not working for me anymore, unless i'm working to earn money then i'd take exception..but i'm kind of in a losing end. time is money, everything is almost spent with it, without it i won't make it in this world anyway. to sum up the first episode. thanks to everyone, but it's time to go. i'll post some prelude tomorrow morning. remember WEDNESDAY YOU SHOULD FINISH THE ASSIGNMENT OR ELSE!